Rejection… it’s not just something we experience in our dating (or past) lives. We feel it often at work. Whether you’re in the ‘front-line’ making sales or sit in creative meetings, brainstorming new business ideas – rejection is everywhere.
But, is it what we really think it is. There’s a lot of negative stigmas with rejection. No one wants to go through it. Why? Because we all want to be liked, even if we deny it. And in the case of our ancestors, rejection meant death.
The truth is, we don’t like hearing the word no. We like to be validated and feel a sense of belonging. But it’s time for us to reframe this fear and look at rejection from another angle.
Can you image a world where everyone says yes?
We need ‘no’ in our life. If every idea got greenlit, a lot of money and time would get wasted. Not every person is ideal for that job vacancy. See, the first important thing to remember with rejection is it’s not personal.
If you can remind yourself of this when you’re feeling rejected, it’ll be much easier to move on from. Detach your feelings from the situation and don’t place your ‘stories’ on it.
Just because you didn’t get that job or client, it doesn’t mean you’re ‘not good enough.’ It’s simply that you didn’t get the opportunity.
Look for the lesson and re-evaluate. This rejection might be a hidden wake-up call and a blessing in disguise. You might be reaching for something that really doesn’t resonate with you deep down – maybe they see that but you can’t yet.
Spend the time to deep dive into the situation, yourself, and what you want. Be open to changing what comes out of this.
But, at the same time, realise that no could well have come from something else – their own fears, insecurities, triggers, and resistance. A Psychology Today article talks about how rejection should be thought of as resistance. It’s more about them resisting and not you.
What’s your personality ‘saying’ about your relationship with rejection?
And of course, Tick’s bird types always come into play. What you, let’s say you’re an Eagle. You’re going to respond to a situation very differently than a Dove. You’ll both also have your own perception of what rejection is.
A Dove might feel it if they’re not included in a team call in the workplace or get picked last for a group activity, in an education setting.
To understand ‘rejection’, first you need to know yourself. Get Free Trials of the Tick personality profiles by filling out your information in the red form.
Oh, still feeling bad? Remember this – some of the most successful people have experienced major rejection. J.K. Rowling’s received loads of it before someone finally said yes to Harry Potter.
Rejection shouldn’t define you. Don’t internalise the no. Focus on what comes after it. This is where the real magic happens.